On the non-linear process of grant writing

Dr. Isis recently tweeted:

Alright. I need to get this grant beyond this stage.. http://t.co/jA24qgPPMC

— Dr. Isis (@drisis) August 19, 2014

I hear that. Like, right now. Seriously.

At the beginning of a writing task, especially grant proposals, I always feel like a sad sack who is procrastinating her time away when *THERE IS A DEADLINE OMG, HOW CAN YOU NOT SEE IT COMING?!?!?*. But the thing is, there's always this phase at the beginning of putting some creative endeavour together where your thoughts have to marinate, where the right way to present them has to emerge, where the sparkling way to motivate and reveal your objectives and the (naturally) brilliant way you plan to go get 'em comes forward. For me that involves a lot of scribbling stuff on paper, staring at a wall, going for a jog, writing garbage I know I'll delete later, and consuming a lot of coffee. It feels *SUPER* unproductive. But so far, I've found that otherwise I stare at an unrelenting blinking cursor that fills me with anxiety as the seconds to the deadline tick away. Or, if I'm really stubborn and write without being ready, I'll throw away even more time writing something disconnected and disorganized that has to be largely discarded anyway.

So, two questions:

1. Does anyone have a more efficient feeling formula for getting past this stage? (my deadline is in less than a week...)

2. Has anyone studied the non-linear progress of writing tasks? (my deadline is in less than a week: if my productivity takes a major hockeystick upturn on say.. Tues, all will be fine. reassurance that will happen is welcome.)

An observation on interviewing for academic positions

I am far more impressed with someone who slightly understates their abilities and accomplishments than someone who even slightly overstates them.

As a student, you can get away with this a bit. You might get found out, but it's ok to ask for instruction. Interviewing for a faculty position though.. well, that's different. You are presenting yourself as an expert, and the work you present defines that area of expertise. My observations on several recent searches indicate you will get discovered. Damn, it looks embarrassing. Overconfidence will work in your favour.. to a point. And stepping outside your comfort zone is important, but be ready to acknowledge where you are stretching yourself and know where your true wheelhouse is. I was pretty brash when I interviewed, but I'm also pretty sure I said "I don't know" at least once and I don't recall anyone pointing out any logical or factual flaws in what I presented.

So here's the second kicker.. of recent such search-related events, more male candidates than female candidates have gotten caught in this trap. Now, these are still small number statistics, and they're not 100% even at that. But it is a curious observation, and I will keep collecting data. In the case where people started digging into the female candidates' knowledge (something I also noticed happens more often.. but that's a different story), they more often than not revealed the depth of their knowledge and ability to communicate it. Apparently they were holding this on reserve, or were sparing us those "I'm saying this so you know that I know" moments. Male candidates were more likely to get tripped up as the questions started to flow.. usually because they had left an obvious thread to tug at.

What are your thoughts on interview strategy? Present yourself as all-knowing regardless of your experience? Present yourself as close to "you" as you can under such artificial circumstances? Does anyone else have observations on gender differences? Does a preference here one way or the other here represent an unconscious bias in some way? And am I swimming against the tide by going for the understated? What should I tell my trainees when they go out to interview?

Things I didn't even understand about myself, but Dr. Isis does

So, first, YAY! Dr. Isis is back. Apparently I have been living under a rock and missed this momentous occasion. Oh, and if you've been "following" this blog, I'm sure you'll agree that I must have been living under a rock. Something like that.. it's called "tenure track". Second, she's seriously BACK, writing brilliant, poignant and witty posts as per usual. Like this post that describes Dr. Isis' evolution of her own understanding of herself and the male-dominated world she operates in that resonated with me to an uncanny degree. The progression she underwent of "fitting in as one of the boys" but actually being some sort of novelty, and thinking maybe she had some sort of upper hand being the young/cute/unique one are phases I identify with clearly. And yet I too have outgrown both attitudes. I've recently been bothered by being bothered by my place as a woman in a highly male dominated field. I wondered why it was that *now* I suddenly was struggling with this just as it should really be having less and less impact on me. But the reality is that *now* is the time more than ever I want and need to be respected for what I'm capable of and am doing.. not for being cute, and coincidentally smart on the side. She ends with: "I still wear makeup, I still dress nicely, and I still have killer shoes, but I am secure enough in my own abilities to want to make my achievements the focus of the positive attention from my colleagues. I’m secure enough to answer comments on my appearance with an eye roll and to realize that professional compliments that come hand-in-hand with remarks about my appearance don’t come from anyone that is going to really take me seriously or see me as their peer. Those true intellectual relationships are the ones worth finding and cultivating." I hope that someday none of this will matter at all, and a compliment can just be a compliment and not risk diminishing the apparent level of respect between colleagues. But in the meantime, I have no intention of giving up my cute shoes, so I suppose everyone will just have to get over it.

Dear Online Learning Management System

You are not managing to help manage any learning, if I cannot manage to login ever to post valuable learning resources. Sincerely, Disgruntled Professor

Signs the undergrads have returned...

You walk out of your favourite coffee shop into someone shouting "OMG BEER PONG!".

Don't back down

My new mantra: "Don't back down."

It is easy to say "gee, I don't know if I'll have time", "I'm not sure if that's something I really want to do" and so many variations of this when deep down you know that saying yes is what you should do (maybe it's an extra project with a colleague, one more student than you were planning to supervise, a talk to give, an invitation to review, or even an invitation to an event). I've been busy. So. busy. in my first semester as an assistant prof. Most of the time I resisted the temptation to back down, but a few times I let things slide until it was too late to do them anyway. The things I took on despite some lingering reservations I'm mostly glad I did even though it meant some extra hectic times. Don't get me wrong, I'll say no when I need to say no, but there are those times when you'd rather say no because you know it will be tough but you know the answer ought to be yes.

So next time I'm on the edge of a task precipice? "Don't back down, it's time to dive in."

Visual Information

I just got totally pulled in by this:



Really, in this visual world we live in, and with so much information overload, how can this not be the way of the future.

I've always tried to find visual ways to present my data, in large part because I understand it better that way, but I have to say this inspires me to do more.

I think you might want to rethink your ad there...

So, this may not be the great return to blogging I had in mind, but I simply couldn't help but post this when I saw it today on an academic newsletter I receive:

"Kill harmful bacteria including H1N1."

Really? Kills bacteria? Even H1N1 bacteria? That's special since H1N1 is a virus. If you can't get that right for the ad, do you really think I'm going to trust that it works? Ha!

Moral of the story? General science literacy is IMPORTANT. For consumers who might get sucked in and Ad Execs who majorly FUBAR.

(Oh, and the (*) there which I thought might redeem it? if you look really carefully it says "When used as directed" not something along the lines of "yes, yes, we know H1N1 is a virus, we were just trying to play off the general panic of the public about swine flu".)

still here

bokeh blossoms, originally uploaded by physics*chick.

I'm still here. I'm still planning to blog again.

I'm trying to decide what I want this space to be. I don't feel like I have time to maintain multiple blogs (ha! maintain? you mean like this one?), but I don't like how scattered this one is. For now, posts will remain scattered and sparse.

Take care, enjoy life! I'm going to go enjoy some sun.

science... always harder than you thought it would be...

Quote of the day:

Every problem is like an infinite goldmine of hard.
~hubby

And so I continue to muddle though, working on this thing that was just supposed to be quick and easy, but turned into a way bigger thing than I wanted right now. Thankfully hubby can help!

Il Neige

Yes. It is snowing. Did we just get rid of this stuff? Ugh.

Lest we forget...

Today is Remembrance day (Veteran's day in the US).

I have always taken a moment to mark Remembrance day. This comes primarily as a result of growing up in a military family, but also because my grandfather fought in World war II. I typically attended Remembrance day ceremonies with my parents, and of course it was a day of reflection on what so many sacrificed in war for us.

However, regardless of your feelings about war and military, I hope you will take a moment today to reflect on the many sacrifices our parents, grandparents and many more before them have made to give us the lives we have today. The world is as it is today because of those decisions and efforts, and it's really not such a bad place. We also have a long way to go and that is our responsibility now.

In Flanders fields the poppies blow
Between the crosses row on row,
That mark our place; and in the sky
The larks, still bravely singing, fly
Scarce heard amid the guns below.

We are the Dead. Short days ago
We lived, felt dawn, saw sunset glow,
Loved and were loved, and now we lie
In Flanders fields.

Take up our quarrel with the foe:
To you from failing hands we throw
The torch; be yours to hold it high.
If ye break faith with us who die
We shall not sleep, though poppies grow
In Flanders fields.

~Lieutenant Colonel John McCrae, MD (1872-1918) Canadian Army

CO2 eating rocks? Cool... but wait a minute...

So, now that I have a PhD, I should probably try to say intelligent things more often. Or maybe I should do my corrections... nah.

Anyway, I saw this article: Scientists say a rock can soak up carbon dioxide, and I thought "Cool! I mean, we should still stop burning around in giant unnecessary vehicles, but in the meantime, this sounds interesting. I'm going to blog this!"

But then my critical faculties came online again (I guess I'm not hung-over enough), and it occurred to me that this is about equivalent to burying your garbage/nuclear waste/toxic shizz-nizzle. So, let's see if everyone is with me here... If a rock absorbs CO2... at some point it has to release it again, right?

So, maybe burning coal and just shoving those emissions away in a rock for someone to deal with later... not such a good idea?

Many companies are hoping to cut their greenhouse gas emissions by siphoning off large amounts of carbon dioxide from coal-fired power plants and storing it underground.

Because I'm pretty sure we should check into this...

That method could require thousands of miles of pipelines and nobody is sure whether the potentially dangerous gas would leak back out into the atmosphere in the future.

before we smother our future progeny with our procrastination regarding fossil fuels rather than just getting on with doing things better. :(

That's Dr. to you.

I am done. That will be Dr. physics*chick from now on.

Must go drink now. Details maybe later... maybe fuzzy...

Defending your thesis... to study? or not to study?

So, I'm t-6 days to D-day (yes, it took them 3 months to get me a defence date... no, I do not want to talk about it yet.. there is a big post on the mess of all that brewing), and the question I keep getting is "what are you doing to prepare for your defence?". My answer so far has been mostly "Um, I have some slides?" with a subtext in my head of "I wrote the damn thesis, I think I know what's in there". But it's started to freak me out. I guess I'll re-read a little about a few peripheral topics, but beyond that and checking my talk for timing, I don't think I'm going to do anything besides set an alarm to make sure I get up. I hate studying (reading & learning things, that's different), it makes me nervous, and nervous is the last thing I want to be.

So here's my question to you internet scientists out there:

What (did you/will you/think you will/see others) do to prepare?

Some really high productivity procrastination...

So, I should be working on a paper, but I'm having trouble decyphering "good data" (ie. that was acquired under the intended conditions) from "bad data" (ie. that may not have been acquired under the intended conditions and is therefore really freakin' wonky). I'll leave the debate about distinguishing "good data" from "bad data" and the validity of so doing for another time... maybe this paper isn't going anywhere...

Anyhow, in my preoccupied state (come on Canadian dollar... go up... go UUUUP!!!) I decided to look at Science Careers to see if I could find hubby a job (totally related to the whole dollar issue... more on that and my many bureaucratic frustrations another time...) and got side tracked looking at some of the career articles. In particular, Maximizing Productivity and Recognition, Part 3: Developing a Research Plan, which is actually something I've been thinking about since I wrote my applications for postdoctoral scholarships. The article is well-written and well-structured, so I won't repeat it here. Go check it out. I'm going to read the other two later. We can all use a publication productivity boost, and well, I've tried collaborations a few times and have certainly learned a few things about what can go awry... but I think I could use the help in making a successful link.

1. Maximizing Productivity and Recognition, Part 1: Publication, Citation, and Impact
   
2. Maximizing Productivity and Recognition, Part 2: Collaboration and Networking
   
3. Maximizing Productivity and Recognition, Part 3: Developing a Research Plan
   

Meme-time: 6 random things about me

Tagged a while back by the lovely but disgruntled Julie...

The rules:



At long last and in no particular order:

1. I am deathly afraid of anything that stings. Bees, wasps, hornets, jellyfish (which are gross anyway), and probably scorpions though I've never met one. This deep seated phobia most likely results from the fact that I have never been stung combined with all those awful reports about killer bees and too many bee segments on sesame street when I was but a wee lass. Now, at the ripe old age of 28, I leap up and run away, usually flailing and screaming like an imbecile at the sight of such a creature. It is incredibly embarrassing. ... and now I have shared it with the entire internet...
   
2. A list within a list: 6 places I love and would run off to in a heart-beat, again in no particular order because that would require too much thought and not be very random. Halifax, Chamonix-Mont Blanc, Bermuda, Paris, San Gimignano, San Sebastian. I would like to see: Rome, Kyoto, all of New Zealand, Hawaii, New York (no! never been!), Crete.
   
3. I very seriously considered doing a degree in Music. I started playing violin when I was 8 years old "because my friends were doing it" and played seriously all through school and undergrad. I still play occasionally, though not enough to keep my skills up. I told myself that I could always pick it up again later, but that I wasn't likely to go back to physics if I stopped.
   
4. I very seriously considered not doing a PhD. In fact I moved all my stuff across the country... and then moved it back when I changed my mind. I hated grad school. Then I realized that was normal, and actually I did like research (just not grad school).
   
5. I learned to knit when I was about 9. I wanted to learn when I saw my grandmother knitting in her chair once when we were visiting when I was very small. I have a vague fuzzy memory of sitting on the floor looking up at what she was doing while watching her soaps and realizing she was making something real out of yarn, and as with everything at that age, well, I wanted to do it too. She said I was too young but promised to teach me when I was older. Unfortunately she didn't get the chance as she passed away not too long after, but my mother kept the bargain a few years later and I knit a scarf for my Dad for Christmas as my first real project. I was pretty proud of myself (for making it and managing to keep it a surprise!), and pretty sure my Nanny would approve. :) I didn't keep up knitting then, but the skills returned quickly when I picked up again a few years ago to pass the sometimes long waiting times in the lab.*
   
6. I cannot eat tomatoes. I'm not allergic, but I have such a strong dislike that I cannot swallow them. This causes problems as most people, like my husband who went ahead and cooked a whole lasagne for me without asking first, assume that everyone likes tomatoes. I once even had a tomato nightmare: I dreamed that I was eating raw potatoes out of a sack (don't ask where that came from... no I don't eat raw potatoes either), and then I pulled out a tomato and *shudder* took a giant chomp out of it! blaegh.
   

And now to pass it on:

1. Styleygeek@Fumbling towards geekdom
   
2. Connie@physicsknits
   
3. Dr. Brazen Hussy@What the hell is wrong with you? (best blog title ever)
   
4. Dr. Isis@On becoming a domestic and laboratory goddess
   
5. Twigs@Gathering Twigs
   
6. you!!!
   

*ah, yes, this is how a lot of my knitting projects get completed, sitting in front of the computer as data is being acquired. it is a great way to pass time when you need to do something requiring little to no thought every 8 min. *knit, knit, knit, click, click, save, click knit, knit...* this is an excellent strategy for passing the time and getting knitting done, even if it is somewhat awkward when your supervisor walks in with an important visitor and starts to ask if you are making a whole sweater. sadly, since writing, my knitting productivity has drastically decreased.

what we do every night pinky... try to take over the world!

more lol celebs!

Who'd a thunk it, right?

BTW, I used to love Pinky and the Brain

Post-doc loc: hint #3

Campanile, originally uploaded by physics*chick.

Ok, so it was already guessed, but for the rest of you, this probably does it. :)

I'm a-movin' ta California!

Quotes of the day

Fitting with the events of the day:
Me: "The days of everybody's dog having 3 iPods is over"
Hubby: "Yup. The last thing an economist wants to hear: 'I can do without it'"

Totally random:
ISS: worst apartment ever. 3 1/2 without gravity, "cozy", limited access to transit.